So my wife and I had an interesting conversation at dinner. She recently purchased some of those fingerless gloves that have a mitten flap. She says they look like shark fins when they’re flapped up. What follows is a truncated transcript:
Steph: I want to fight crime with my shark gloves. What kind of powers can I have.
Jim: (Befuddled laughter)
Steph: I know! I can throw portobello mushrooms at evil doers like frisbees that thump on them. What do they do when they hit people.
Jim: (Smiles)
Steph: I need an author.
Jim: (Continues to smile)
Steph: (Tapping Jim’s arm) I NEED an author.
Jim: Do you want something gruesome or fun?
Steph: FUN!
Jim: (Pausing to think.) The mushrooms could burst into spore and generate more mushrooms on the evildoer’s body.
Steph: Yeah! And I would only give them the antidote if they turn over a new leaf. But I need a battle cry when I throw the mushrooms. What should I say?
Jim: Port you!
Steph: (High fives Jim). Yes. That’s it.
This is one of the many reasons why I love my wife very much.